Linear Collider Fortune Cookies

One way to make fortune cookies from Chinese and some South-East Asian restaurants more amusing is to add the phrase "in between the sheets" to the end.

For physicists keen on seeing a linear e⁺e^- collider built, it can be amusing, heartening, or frightening to add "at a future linear collider."

Some examples (all real):

You will witness a special ceremony [at a future linear collider].

You will soon be involved in many gatherings, parties, and communications....

An empty stomach is not a good political adviser....

Someone wants to get to know you better....

Listen not to the vain words of an empty tongue....

Versatility is one of your outstanding traits....

You will never have to worry about a steady income....

The heart is wiser than the intellect....

Every excess becomes a vice....

Simplicity and civility should be your theme....

Look for new outlets for your own creative abilities....

In God [particle?] we trust; all others pay cash.... (fortuitously typed in as Leon Lederman's voice wafts across the corridor)

Be careful and systematic in your business arrangements....

Good Nature will bring you much happiness....

Feel free to send me other examples.